Steel Panther – Heavy Metal Rules

Grab your Aqua Net and hop in the DeLorean gang, because we’re going back in time with the boys from STEEL PANTHER! They’ve taken us on some pretty wild rides in the past and their newest release Heavy Metal Rules (out September 27) promises to continue that trend. Big riffs and even bigger hair are the order of the day and the nasty boys in the band are here to prove that heavy metal is back in a big way. And let’s be honest, did it ever really leave?

With this record they’ve given us nine rocking tracks to sink our teeth into this time around (and a hilarious intro to kick things off). Blazing guitars and intelligent tongue-in-cheek writing have always been the foundation of what STEEL PANTHER is all about. Michael Starr can sing as well as anyone in the history of the genre. He’s truly a special talent who has great vocal range and flawless comedic timing. Stix Zadinia keeps the rhythm with some impressive drum work and he hits the skins harder than ever before. Lexi Foxx is the sexiest bass player in the land and he provides that sweet low end thunder. And last but certainly not least Satchel proves once again that he is a master shredder that simply cannot be matched.

We get our first blast to the face with “All I Wanna Do Is Fuck (Myself Tonight)”. Starr makes it perfectly clear that if you aren’t as sexy as he is then he’d rather just make love to his own reflection. The subject matter is typical STEEL PANTHER fair, but that’s not a bad thing with songs as awesome as this. “Always Gonna Be A Ho” is the album’s best track. This song checks every box and really hammers home the band’s opinion that they are allowed to cheat on their significant others but not the other way around. Tongue firmly planted in cheek the band sounds as good as ever with this song, an instant classic.

“I Ain’t Buying What You’re Selling” is an amazing acoustic number that closes out the album. The song is surprisingly deep lyrically and is well written and tastefully performed. The group isn’t about to be fooled by the lies we are told on a daily basis and they communicate this message with conviction. Definitely a surprising addition to their library. If you’re already a STEEL PANTHER fan then getting this album is automatic. If you are curious and just want to see what these guys are about then go pick up Heavy Metal Rules. It’s a near perfect blend of hilarious lyrics and world class musicianship. You really can’t go wrong with any disc from this band so go out and grab a copy today!

STANDOUT TRACKS: “Always Gonna Be A Ho”, “All I Wanna Do Is Fuck (Myself Tonight)”, “I Ain’t Buying What You’re Selling”

RATING: 8/10


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